Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize