OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize