omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
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