dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
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