hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
