I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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