Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Don't make out with my wife yet
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
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