Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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