i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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