Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Randomize
