Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
