I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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