went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
