I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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