there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
