just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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