she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
