I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
