i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
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