i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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