i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
