It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
