someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
