Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Randomize
