its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
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