Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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