Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
