We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Randomize