It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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