All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
me + whiskey = a bad person
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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