You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Never underestimate the power of titties
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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