i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize
