It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Randomize
