Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
That was before I lit my hair on fire
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
