whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize
