Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
