Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
