maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
