he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
