I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Randomize