love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Duck Duck Cougar?
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Randomize
