i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Randomize
