just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize