so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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