I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
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