It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
It's no shave November. This is our time.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
