Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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