You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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