you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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