I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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