If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
it hurts more in the daytime
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I checked into jail on foursquare
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Randomize