I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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